"Hereby know we that we dwell in him, and he in us, because he hath given us of his Spirit." (1 John 4: 13)
Abiding in the Lord is not something that we do by our efforts, but something which happens to us when we believe on Jesus Christ.
When we believe in the grace of God through Christ Jesus, then we receive His Spirit.
"22And when he had said this, he breathed on them, and saith unto them, Receive ye the Holy Ghost: 23Whose soever sins ye remit, they are remitted unto them; and whose soever sins ye retain, they are retained." (John 20: 22-23)
At the time that Jesus breathed on the disciples, thus receiving new life, they were hiding in an upper room, for fear of the religious authorities. Many of them were fearful, and one of them, who missed Jesus' appearance the first time, demanded to see the prints in his hands and side before believing.
The Holy Spirit did not enter into people who were perfect. The Holy Spirit did not wait for the disciples to confess their unbelief. They say Jesus, and the received His Spirit.
We do not struggle to abide in Christ, but we simply believe on Him (John 6: 29)
Consider what Paul writes to the Romans:
"For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father." (Romans 8: 15)
Notice that "ye have received" -- it's in the past tense.
We do not earn adoption, or sonship, by anything that we do. Sonship comes as a gift. We are reborn as sons. How can we every think that we earn it in some manner?
We do not struggle to get the Spirit, or to work up the Spirit in our lives, but rather rest and receive more of His grace and peace in our lives:
"22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, 23Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law. 24And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts." (Galatians 5: 22-24)
The fruit of the Spirit is not created by our striving, but His living and thriving within us:
"I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing." (John 15: 5)
Jesus is our life, and His life lives through us by the power of His Holy Spirit.
"And because ye are sons, God hath sent forth the Spirit of his Son into your hearts, crying, Abba, Father." (Galatians 4: 6)
We are in Jesus, and Jesus lives in us, because He has given us His Spirit. Not a person whom we earn or strive for, but a person whom we receive by grace through faith.
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